Love Is Deeper than Anything

      I got in a fight with my relative and I ended up cleaning my whole room (cleaning is what I do when I'm frustrated) but maybe that was the positive outcome. My relative isn't exactly young and I was sitting on my bed preparing to sleep when I remembered a story my Grandpa told us. It's not so much of a story as it's a real life example that can teach a lesson.


      A man that my Grandpa knows had his wife die a few years ago. No health problems or illnesses close to her death, it was just old age. She walked in after she finished gardening and said she was going to lay down because she was feeling "funny" and out of order. He said, "Yes dear." and she left the room. Two hours after she went to lay down her husband went into their bedroom to check on where she lay sleeping on the couch. She had died in her sleep. The last thing he had said to her was "Yes dear."


      We all wish that, if someone we know has to die, that our last words will be good ones. Nobody wants to be angry and in a fight with another person then have that person die. You never know if they were thinking of you as they died, and you will always wish your last words had been something different.

      My relation and I were not yelling or screaming at each other, it was just my general teenage-ness that cause a big cleaning spree at ten o'clock at night. This was somewhat our conversation:

      "You guys have to be out of the house before nine tomorrow, I have some kids coming over for lessons and a recital." She said, sitting in her comfy red chair.
      Standing across the room, Rabecca smiled and said with a flipant air, "Well I'll have to get up at six then. To do my hair, makeup, get dressed-"
      "And to clean the bathroom."
      Frowning as she looked at her Rabecca didn't know whether her Grandmother was joking or not so she decided to go with the more pleasant idea. Laughing she said, "Right now? Why do I have to do it?" Standing as she was she imagined the small bathroom shared between the seven grandkids usually inhabiting the house. It was a filthy place but it always had been, Rabecca couldn't imagine it truly clean.
      Rabecca had always been shy around adults because with most of them she felt young, inexperienced, niave, and she could never tell what the older people were feeling. Senior citizens were the most nerve wracking, their intelligence being to wide that Rabecca had no idea what could possibly be going on inside their heads. As for jokes she always waited until someone else laughed first, fearing the consequence of laughing at something that wasn't supposed to be funny.
      Suddenly her face became serious and she said, "You're going to do it right now. You can help too missy." Pointing a finger at Rabecca's little sister, she stood and continued speaking, "You can use the stuff I have in my cupboard, I'll show you how." Walking away, Rabecca stared in first bewilderment then confusion.
      It was ten o'clock at night and she wanted Rabecca to clean the bathroom that probably had dirt from 1997 in it? What had Rabecca done wrong? Was this a punishment? Surely it was but she couldn't think of anything that could warrant such a unfair treatment. Maybe she'd been a little too high on her self when she'd asked why she had to do it, but they'd been joking! At least... Rabecca had thought they were.
      Deciding to ask her mother as the offending woman went down the hallway with cleaning supplies she tried for a smile, "I can't tell if she's joking or not."
      Suddenly her head popped out from the bathroom, "Oh I'm serious! Come here girls." So they both obeyed and fit themselves inside the bathroom. "Have you ever cleaned a bathroom before?" Rabecca had but she shook her head, preoccupied with her thoughts.

      What had she done the warranted cleaning the bathroom at ten o'clock at night? Further more why would she make Rabecca do it at ten o'clock at night? It was bed time, past bed time if you actually followed the house rules. What had Rabecca done? Rabecca felt her eyes fill up with tears, she'd always hated it when adults yelled at her. Anybody yelling at her when Rabecca wasn't angry as well made Rabecca cry.
      "Have I hurt your feelings?" Her voice was impatient and tart as she looked up from pouring cleaning powder around the sink rim.
      Lashing out like a wounded animal, Rabecca said with a wobbly voice, "It's ten o'clock at night and you're mad at me and making me clean the sink when I don't even know what I did to make you mad."
      "I'm not mad."
      "You're yelling at me!" More tears followed after the others, tracking down her cheeks. Rabecca felt even worse because her amazing cousin walked by and saw her crying, his face frowning. She was crying uncontrollably and the most amazing cousin who felt no pain, never seemed to become angry or sad, was seeing her. It was humiliating as well as confusing, making Rabecca cry even more.
      "Oh just go to bed and I'll clean it. I'm just the tired one but you go on to bed. Good night girls." And she prodded them sharply from the bathroom, into their small ramshackle bedroom. Rabecca's little sister sat right down and started readying herself for bed but Rabecca couldn't because her cheeks were still being flooded with tears.
      Suddenly angry she started tearing shirts from her suitcase and folding them, moving her hands because the only other choice she had was pretend to go to sleep.


      I didn't understand and I was trying to be funny but that started an entire argument that ending in the house being shinier and me sitting in my bed thinking, "What if she died tonight? The last thing I would have said to her was 'Why do I have to clean it?" My mom suggested I run upstairs and tell her I love her but I tried to say I wouldn't mean it but that was a lie.

I quickly changed my mind and ran up the stairs and hugged her, telling her I was sorry for becoming snobby and for being angry at her. I felt so much better than I had when I hadn't said I loved her that I knew I's done the right thing.


      Her hug and apology for being a little impatient with me will stick in my mind for a long time because even the wisest of people can act like an immature teenager (who does that sound like? ... give you a hint... it's the writer of this blog) and get angry at a person they love. It also helped cement the knowledge that she loves me... at times I doubt it but now I have something to look back on and say to myself... see she does love you! Never think thats she doesn't.

      Love is the most precious thing we have in this world, if we let it slip away then we have failed in our lives. You can have all the money in the world but if you leave behind no one who loves you then your life meant nothing. I found that out tonight and I would like to ask you few readers... if you read this then forgive the people you love then forget, because love is the most important thing you can get.


Irish Princess
            (in my dreams)
Rabecca

Happy 4th Folks… even if it's the 14th

      I meant to write this on the fourth but my day was taken up with breakfast at the park then an afternoon and night BBQ. I love the 4th of July though. It's the booming fire crackers, the sparkly ground fireworks, and the amazing aerials. 


      Sitting on the curb listening to Jeff Dunham with one ear, my Grandma's neighbors with the other, and watching the sparklers in all the little kid's hands it hit me. The 4th is such a happy occasion because it marks the beginning of the holiday season. Everyone likes the BBQ's and the fireworks, unless your antisocial, because it creates a sense of neighborhood. It creates a stronger sense of family which people seem to have lost lately. (Now don't click out, thinking this is just another "Families are lost and teenagers are the route of sin in the modern world!" thing cause it's not. This is an honest post about how people seem to have forgotten what family is and why we have a family. And it helps that this post is from a teenager… I won't be cussing them out because I am a teenager and I don't think we're that bad.)

Yes, I'm only fourteen but I do notice things around me. I take pride on how I can talk to my family without being the classic teenager. My Dad and I talk politics, my Mom and I talk about our dreams and (yes i know) her boyfriends and what I want my boyfriends to be. I talk to my sister and we laugh and hug regularly. I got in a petty little fight maybe once last year, this year not at all. I don't consider the grumpy moods or the biting comments fighting because it's not, it's just the way we interact. I think that families don't have to be Pleasant Ville but we don't have to be separate people wishing only for the comfort of friends so you can "get away from my family".


      During the BBQ I saw my grandparents, cousins, and two of my siblings connect and didn't a fight… it was pretty surreal. My family isn't the separate unit type but usually there is some bickering going on. I love the family and I love everything about how parents take care of the kids then the kids take care of the parents while raising their kids... the whole wheel of caring and taking care of each other is something totally based in the family.


      I just wanted to say happy fourth of july, even though I'm writing this on the fourteenth.


Irish Princess
(in my dreams)
Rabecca Riches

Reality TV

      My Aunt recently introduced me to reality TV. You know, The Real Housewives of Orange County (New York City or New Jersey) and the Bachelorette or Bachelor. I think that the Bachelor and Bachelorette are some what pretty good shows even though most of it is publicity and fake, but the Real Housewives is ridiculous and most of it is because these women want attention. All drama! But for a writer like me, it was fascinatingly annoying instead of just annoying.

      What people will do for attention is astounding. The ladies would meet each other and swear that they'd "always been a good friend to" such and such person but then the camera would go to their private interview and they'd diss and gossip about the person they'd just sworn was their best friend. And you have to know that these ladies watch the show and see everything the other girls say about them. The things they would say was infuriating because the women wouldn't listen to each other when they were with each other! They would listen to one thing then go off on a tirade and rant about how "She wrote 'congrats on redoing your house'... what's that supposed to mean?!?"


      My question is this: If these ladies weren't so dramatic, self centered, and totally selfish then these reality shows wouldn't exist because nobody would watch them. When the women are nice, nobody watches the show so the producers ask the ladies to gossip more or start a fight with their ex-best friend. I felt sad for these women because they are making themselves miserable and fighting needlessly just for TV ratings. People watch the show to see how bad their attitudes are because it makes them feel good about their life, or it gives them ammo for a diss war with their enemies. 

      And the Bachelorette, here's my major problem. This girl is putting herself on TV and looking through 20 guys then narrowing down to one in epic dates. But she'd have no problem dating out in the real world because she is beautiful and very nice and a very good person. So really this girl has all these guys at her beck and call and she gets to decide who stays or goes. Yes, maybe she wants to find true love but I think anybody who does a Bachelor show is a bit of a player. Why? All those people of their opposite gender are at the beck and call and I think it's slightly childish and fickle.


      For example, those guys are from every corner of the country and you never know what you're getting. For example, with the guy that she sent away. He went on the show to promote his business and himself but while he was with the Bachelorette he lied and made her fall in love with him. The latest news was that he came back on the show and set off a whole bunch of complaints with the guys on the show. He was a cheat and a scammer but the girl thinks she loves him. But I am sure that most of that is publicity. Sure, she might really like him. Maybe he was told from the start to be the bad guy so she could magically "change" him even after he was sent away. Nobody knows but the producers and that's why everyone is addicted to the show sooo much. 


      Anyway, this post was written because I want to tell somebody that these shows are not real! This is not the way real life goes. Normal people grow up with friends and family they love then they find a person to spend eternity with, the normal dating way, and they live out their lives normally. Sure sometimes they fall away from their friends but thats the way life goes. It's the way life goes and there's nothing you can do. I've learned to deal with it because some people don't know what they want so they go to TV shows and adopt what other people want. That's the cause of all the drama every where.

      I ask you to think about what you want out of life. Think about the fact that some of your unhappiness is caused by the shows you watch. What do you watch? MTV or Disney? Is your friend life happy or filled with secrets and lies? 


      Think about your life and ask yourself, "Is my life mine or MTV's?"


      Something to think about
Irish Princess (in my dreams)
            Rabecca Riches

Country Music

      I am a lover of country, pop, boy band rock, rock, classical, everything Celtic, some jazz, and some blue grass music. But I would choose country over all the rest of them because I was raised on it and some of my happiest memories have country music tied into them.

      People today seem to have the idea that all country music is about big trucks and beer. That country music is nothing more than the ranting of drunk hicks who recently came back in from the fields where they harvested their latest crop of tobacco, who started drinking and got two words to rhyme.

      I'm here to set those people straight. Yes, some music is about that but that's maybe one percent. Most of it is about family, patriotism, and it teaches lessons that need to be reenforced in the falling apart society. Songs are coming out with titles of "I Just Had Sex", "Blood on the Dance Floor", and "My Humps" which were taboo words a few years ago. Teenager stars are singing songs about those things when they're only 14, 10 year olds are dating, and teenagers are getting pregnant left and right. Country music might have some bad songs but most of them are good songs.

      Country has these things:
- understandable lyrics
- singable lyrics
- reasonable beat
- fun stories or meaningful lessons

      Country doesn't have:
- obscene amount of cussing
- heavy bass that causes deafness
- meaningless hippy words that preach dissing your family and doing drugs
- words describing things that should never be said

- the music videos aren't embarrassing to have your parents see

      I watched a movie, Forever Strong, and it had a part that I really liked. "We will not do anything that embarrasses us, our friends, or our family" I thought that line was amazing because it should be true. If your embarrassed about playing music or saying words in front of your parents then you shouldn't be doing that stuff away from them.

      But I digress from the subject I promised to talk about.

     Country is not the hick's beer song everyone thinks it is, Perhaps people don't listen to it anymore because you can't jump up and down to it, or maybe it's because it makes a person think about things. I like it because it has kept my family rooted in good values and I can sing along to the song (you can't sing along prettily to Smack That.) which is half of why I love it. I don't know who you are but if your reading this just know that just because Country has a few bad songs about beer and trucks, just think of how many songs there are of drugs, sex, and cheating there are in the popular genres? How would they compare to the amount of beer songs in country music?

      I love country and that's why I would choose it over everything else. Country makes a person stop and look at the things that really matter, not just being sexy so you can grind on a random person at a club where fighting and cheating happens every night.

      P.S. This blog was sparked by someone I just met who claimed country music was all about beer, trucks, and more beer. I gently made them think about their words with basically the same words I used in this post, besides, their words weren't even theirs. It was something they heard from someone else who was cooler then them so they decided to copy and try and be "cooler" too.

Irish Princess (in my dreams)
Rabecca

Wish I Could Skate

      So I'm with my cousins in Utah for Summer Break, the second day we were here we went to the skate park and the girls sat in the grass and chatted while the two boys went on their bike and skateboard and did tricks. It was the first time I've ever been to a skate park and I thought it was really cool.

      I have a skate board but all I can do is stand on it and roll a short way before I fearfully jump off. My cousin can do all sorts or tricks and I stand in awe of him. I wish I could skate like him. My cousin is nice and humble but he can skate so well that even he can't brush it off as "nothing"

      This same cousin told me as we were walking back to the house that the hottest thing he'd ever seen was a girl skateboarding at the park and actually doing tricks instead of rolling around squealing. Most guys wouldn't care much about girls skateboarding but coming from a guy who is "the" skater in our family this was a revelation. It made me start to wonder, guys have hobbies right? Gaming, running, swimming, camping, painting, guitar playing... do they like it when girls can match their skill level or at least keep up with them? Because if girls could meet and date guys who enjoyed the same hobbies they did the world would be much simpler.

      For example; I like playing the guitar and writing, painting, and other artistic things. If I could meet a guy who liked the same things I do then we'd have that much more to talk about. Don't get me wrong, the strong and smart guys who fit the bill for "tall, dark. and handsome" appeal to me too but being able to hang with a guy who laughs at the same jokes I do, enjoys the same things I do, and who doesn't think my dreams are slightly foolish would be a dream come true.

      But where to find a guy who fits my bill?

      Isn't it weird to imagine that your boyfriends, even your husband (or "girlfriends, even your wife" if you're a guy) is growing up right now? That he's doing things and learning in school, getting hurt and getting lessons learned? My question is, where would I find a guy who likes the same things I do without using a website? I could go hang out places that people who like the things I like hang out but that means choosing one thing I like above all else. I like all of my hobbies equally for different reasons. Some are potential jobs, others are for my pure pleasure and won't earn me anything.

     This brings me back to my earlier comment. My cousin found a girl skater hot, and he said she wasn't the prettiest girl to ever cross his path. Would a guy who like writing or guitar playing find me cooler then most of his girl friends because I did the thing he liked to do? I don't know. I wish I could skate like that girl, or play the guitar well enough to feel good about going to a spot where other people who played the guitar hung out so I'd be able to meet guys who played the guitar.

      In short, I wish I could be like that girl I never knew, who had the courage to do what she loved in front of others and in turn, earning the respect of several guys.

      I've begun to find out that guys aren't really all that hard to impress. Some guys like the skimpy clothes and fake faces but most guys I know like smiling girls who are true to themselves. Like I asked around if guys liked this profile pic or that one. Most guys told this one, the one where I was kissing my dog and laughing. I had my other one where I was looking sultry and it was taken from above so you could see all the way down my shirt... the guys liked the playful picture more. That was amazing. Movies and tv would have us believe that girls have to be sultry all the time, but really guys like a girl who can be true to herself and skate in a skatepark and just laugh and have fun. I wish I could be like that girl and be myself enough that I could do something I love and unintentionally catch the interest of guys who liked the things I liked.

Irish Princess (in my dreams)
Rabecca

Music, Expressing Things That Can't Be Said

      Music has always been a part of our culture, whether cave man or sophisticated king. Like the tale of Pan, the god of wild things and the pan flute, music has always been so strong that it takes up a part of our history.

      I believe that music is a way to say love, hate, sadness, or jealousy without ever saying a word. It's the most powerful type of talking because it invokes feelings so that the listener can take the music and make it part of him. Nowadays it's hard to get feelings from music because it's all heart throbbing, jumping up and down, mash pit stuff that talks about sex and late nights at the club with a newfound beau. It used to be that music was wordless and only used the emotions of the listener to give it it's power. Maybe it's a personal thing with me, but I think that the reason people like the mash pit music is because it is safer and easier to listen to then symphonies and great ballads. For example, I recently listened to a track that told the story of a man. He falls in love with a woman but it's a false love, she betrays him and ends up being burned alive for being a witch. Yet while she's dying he still loves her and he pledges his heart to the girl. But, as all stories do, his life moves and and he forgets about her. But when he dies he goes to hell to be tormented by a hag he discovers is the soul of that witch. It's a difficult piece of music to figure out and it teaches a lesson.

      Music that has only words of love and lust is easy to listen to so most of the populace listens to that and they distain anything with the words "old", "modest", or "symphony" near it. It takes a bit of time to be able to listen to classical music and not die of boredom. It also takes a mature mind... little kids can listen to classical music but everything they hear is a blur and all they see in their heads is swirls and bursts of color. To close your eyes and see and feel a song is a wonderful but hard-won thing.

      What brought this on you ask?

      I recently went to a high school concert for the end of the year to showcase all their hard work. It was a wonderful concert but all my friends confided that they found all the songs - except for the violin rendition of Apologize - boring. I don't know how, my foot was tapping along to all the songs. But when I think about it, I realize that they have only been exposed to the mash pit music and therefore the slower, more meaningful songs such as the Cannon Waltz and Swan Lake would seem boring and slow to them. There is a reason those songs are still listened to after one hundred years while Justin Beiber will be older than Bob Marley by the time I turn twenty five. I love them dearly, but my friends have been close minded to listening to music. As a favor to your favorite Irish Princess, listen to a song called "In the Hall of the Mountain King" with an open mind. It might surprise you what happens when you just let go of your walls and listen for the little muse inside you that can tell you the next great idea. Music feeds our muse, and not just Katy Perry and Lady Gaga. Try some Beetles, Beach boys, Rockapella, and if you're brave enough to open you eyes wide enough try some Hayden and Gershwin.

      Being able to listen with an open mind to a century old piece of music takes skill and willingness that shows you are an open mided individual who can think for yourself and make up your own moral and prefrences. Even if it's not in style at the moment, being true to yourslf and who you are is an important part and everyone.

      To cap off this enlightening post, I will request two things. One, the request I said above and Two, when you go to the next school concert or hear a ballad on the radio, try and listen without instantly scoffing and walking away. You might surprise yourself with who you are.

Irish Princess
      (in my dreams)
Rabecca

Scottish Clans

      I am trying to find out if I can join a scottish clan or not, even though I have no idea if any of my blood has come from Scotland.

      It's probable that I have some scottish blood in me, my Dad's family came from Northern Europe countries but the problem is I don't know which clan would be mine, how I could join it, or even if I can. I'm an American and therefore I can't really claim any one nationality because I was raised eating sausages and pizza in the same meal, two nationalities that are no where near each other but mixed together in American society. I wish I could claim to be scottish, that I could eat haggis without puking, and dance the fast songs without tripping over my feet but I can't say any of that.

      All my life I've wanted to go to Scotland or Ireland (though Ireland sounds more fun in the sense of stories, Scotland has a lot more history and places to see though someone could argue it is the opposite way around.) This entire thing has been brought on because I am going to Scotland for slightly more than a week this summer and I really want to be able to claim that I do, in some small way, belong there more than a common tourist. But because I'm shy about asking for things in person, I'm writing this now is hopes that one of the people who glance at my blog while they browse can comment and answer my question.

Irish Princess
      (in my dreams)
Becca